Still waiting on ikea furniture. And my new credit card. Citi credit card takes… forever to approve me. When I want the card urgently, they will take forever. When I don’t need a credit card for shit - it gets approved and next day’d to me. Story of my life. Murphy’s law? Or just… me remembering only the negative?
Typing this out on a ghetto standing desk above my stove. My laptop is above a roll of paper towels which is above my stove. Ghetto.
Been sleeping on a sleeping bag on top of a comforter on top of bed sheets… not enough padding. Not even a single futon level of Japan. My back hurts. Urgh. Weak. At first I thought… suffering builds character. But then… now it’s like. Suffering isn’t helping because my character has endured enough suffering. No need for pointless suffering.
Went to my first bjj class. It was google hosted. So great. Free class from a googler. I got… crushed. I’m kinda scared to put google and googler in my blog cause… you’re not suppose to write about anything. Well. I don’t think I should be too fearful. But at the same time… isn’t it obvious that what I write here is just ramblings of a crazy nerd?
Today woke up, wrote some code, drank some coffee. Went to the gym. Met up with a friend. Explored new york. Had ikinari steak in NYC. It’s uh… pretty much the exact same taste as tokyo. I’m so spoiled. But… new york. The dream has come true. My place… it’ll be complete within 3 more weeks.
I gotta schedule eye doctor, regular doctor and dentist. The triple daily checkups. Now that I got my coverage card. Gotta make sure my health is in order. I actually had a really freaky accident. I didn’t tell anyone because… I feel like saying it would make it true? Or bad? Actually, it’s more like I don’t want to scare my family. So the night before my flight into nyc… I woke up at like 2am to take a piss. After I took a piss… I blacked out and face planted. Yeah. I only blacked out from standing to… faceplant. I was fully conscious right after… and my first thought was… I’m gonna die now. My time is now. I’ve lived the good life. Later bitches.
Then. It was followed by. Fuck. I’m still alive. Life is gonna suck. Fuck. I gotta look at the damage. Fuck. I can feel my nose bleeding like shit… and possibly my teeth bleeding everywhere as well. Fuck. What if I black out again when I decide to get up? I think I was just super dehydrated. I felt really thirsty and kept drinking water. Was pretty paranoid. Anyways. There was blood flowing all over my face… it looked like I was hit by a truck or something. So that’s why people say they fell when it looked like they got their asses kicked. It looks… surprisingly similar.
Anyways. I fly over to uh… NYC and get my visa stamped at the airport. But.. flight day, I have essentially two black eyes and a huge cut on the side of my face. First day at work, I gotta take a picture for my badge. Yup. Black eye and fresh cut. That’s the picture on my badge…. forever. I guess that’ll be an interesting story for people who actually look at my badge in detail.
So my place has a dishwasher. I uh… spent an extra $300 a month to get the place with a dishwasher. Feels dumb. I’ve only used the dishwasher twice. And it was to prewash all my new dishes. Whatever. THe amount of rent I’m paying. It blows my mind. I uh… can’t believe I’m doing this. It’s a much bigger portion of my salary than what I’m comfortable with. Guess it means I gotta work really hard to get promoted.
The next three weeks are gonna be… finishing up my move in. Settling in. I’m uh, still living an essentially unscheduled life. I want to uh… get my routine going. It’s all about habits and building a virtuous cycle. The food is so good. My new place has no ac…which by itself is fine since I dream of living in a tropical place. I’m used to 25C at home. It’s just that currently there’s no chair or bed. So the forced ghetto standing desk is uh, exertion and causing me to sweat much more.
I’ve been feeling. Sigh. Not depressed but like… empty. Like. This is it? Like. I know it’s not. There’s so much more for me… but like. It’s that feeling of… when you’re dreams come true and you get the feeling of… it was so much better when I was imagining it. Dreaming about it felt better than achieving it in reality. I guess… it’s about the journey and not the destination… because when you reach the destination… it’s all about the journey.
And wow. My journey thus far. Has been dream coming true one after another. I set myself… a really ambitious dream for 2018 and 2019. That’s the amount of time I’ve given myself to reach the next level. The dream… it’s uh… so next level that even I have difficulty in believing it. But. I know that I gotta be the one to believe in it. I gotta believe and take action. That’s the only way for dreams to become reality.
From Toronto to SF. From SF to Tokyo. From Tokyo all around asia, amsterdam and now finally NYC. The city I’ve dreamed about living in. That… people all over the world dream about visiting and living in. I get this. I live in chelsea. I walked around Penn station and madison square guarden. The new york public library. I see tourists taking pictures. It’s just THERE. For me. My dream came true. Just writing that gave me a chill. I’m in new york. Damn son. It’s… crazy.
Been watching stuff on my tablet. Just. It’s like. Watching old episodes of friends. And other shows set in NYC. Like suits. I’m IN new york. That… still blows my mind. Lastly… well. I forgot what I was gonna write. Oh yeah. Feeling empty. Kinda demotivated recently… it’s like. Different. When I moved to tokyo. I knew what my year would look like… of course it was completely different. But getting to play Persona 5 in Tokyo in Japanese. Shit. That was surreal. I guess… I’ll just have to wait for my NYC dreams to become reality.
Man. I’m worried about that night time incident. It’s like… when I need to pee at night now…. I move extra slow. And I’m extra paranoid. Whatever. Gonna stop now. Life is good. Life is great. But… it feels less that I should be feeling I guess.